Dateline 01 Aug. Canine Gulch Gazette, Morning Edition
For Immediate Release
Dry Gulch, Western Territories - A deal over a year in the making is bringing a new industry to the territories. Doc Pfizer has partnered with his first cousin Budd to distribute fresh beer throughout the area.
Yes, that's right! Our own Doc Pfizer, the man who provides the little blue bottles of magic elixir, has gone into the beer business. Doc won't provide many details, only that he will supply Budd with hopped up hops and elixir in exchange for fresh beer. Budd's backwoods brewery is located back east so the local economy will also benefit from the increased rail traffic.
After an hours wait, Doc's Woody is ready and heading east in the early morning light. The first load of hops and elixir has been given a clear track.
Budd plans to use the elixir to buy off politicians, pay landowners, construction companies and to keep the crews from becoming dysfunctional during his large expansion and tight deadlines. In addition, Budd has purchased several new rail cars to transport product to the territories. These cars are presently being outfitted in our local Triple C Rails shop.
Dateline 02 Aug. Canine Gulch Gazette, Morning Edition
Doc Pfizer is also breaking ground for a distribution center, which he promises, will be "State of the Art". Your favorite gentlemen's club will no longer have to worry about stale or spoiled beer quotes Doc.
The first three storage tanks have arrived and are awaiting installation. Doc hopes sales take off so he can order three more to complete the sixpack.....
Some of Doc's Cayenne pepper plants can be seen turning red in the background... It's almost harvest time.
The Red Magic Elixir tank car is deliberately disguised for fear of train robberies. A light Blue tank car labeled, as Doc's Magic Elixir would require armed guards..... Which can't be trusted.
Doc's big fear is a train wreck where the Elixir gets into a local water supply.
Think about it......
Dateline 03 Aug. Canine Gulch Gazette, Morning Edition
The plan is really starting to come together. Doc's woody backs the last tanker up and couples it to the others. Fresh out of the shop, they look good in the morning dew.
Doc's old woody can't handle more than one.... Even with an added dose of elixir.
The tankers will be added to the daily eastbound freight and should be back in 5 to 6 days.
The men folk can hardly wait for the return from Budds backwoods brewery full of pasturepfized beer. Budd Pfizer promises that his new pasturepfizing process will keep the beer from spoiling. Budd is not divulging any of the secrets to his process but rumors suggest Doc and his magic elixirs have had a hand in it. The local folks are a little skeptical about something from the pasture that keeps beer from spoiling....
Dateline 04 Aug. Canine Gulch Gazette, Morning Edition
Well, bad news for the local folks.... Seems there has been a trestle fire down near Glendale on the Saint John railroad..... The regular eastbound freight can't get through. Some kind of human error caused the fire... Doc is mad as a hornet!!!
Doc is not going to like the price but it looks like he better lease an engine, get some armed guards and deliver the tankers himself.
Dateline 05 Aug. Canine Gulch Gazette, Morning Edition
Yup! It may be a day late and costing Doc a bit more elixir than he wanted but the tankers are finally on their way East. The train is stopping next to the reservoir to pick up a few more sharpshooters.
The reservoir is also where the three frogs Budd made famous hang out...
That’s Fie on the left, Sirr in the center and Phud on the right...
William Robert Oglethrope watching from Doc's private car.
Dateline 11 Aug. Canine Gulch Gazette, Morning Edition
Everyone has been expecting Doc Pfizer to throw a large party with the arrival of the first tankers of BuddsPfizer beer. Well, unfortunately the terrorist activity in the area has forced Doc to make his moves in secret, under cover of darkness.
If this reporter had not been camped by the tracks near Doc's distribution center, I would not have known the first shipment has been received. At around 3:00 this morning, the private train arrived as quietly as possible and the tankers were quickly uncoupled. Armed guards took up position and I was not allowed entry or interviews.
Climbing a tree, I was able to get the following photo.
Shortly after the loco left, Doc's woody made some night moves. Here it is sneaking in amongst the parked cars.
He quickly coupled on a car...... And then sneaked on out of the area.
Since there are no roads between Doc's pepper plantation/tank farm and Canine Gulch, Doc is sending his new delivery truck down on a flat. I noticed at least two forms of protection.
Doc's woody crosses the gulch.
Dateline 12 Aug. Canine Gulch Gazette, Morning Edition
Doc Pfizer is missing!!! Foul play is suspected!!!
Rumors were rampant yesterday and today it was confirmed. Doc has not been seen since the early morning hours of Aug. 11.
Knowing that Doc had reason to celebrate, most folks thought he might be indisposed at Jim's Saloon & Brothel. He was on his way there but never made it....
Fearing a terrorist kidnapping, a couple of strangers were brought in for questioning. The engineer logbooks from these guys indicated very little experience at the throttle... Mostly simulator training.
Call the sheriff with any tips on these two.
Dateline 12 Aug. Canine Gulch Gazette, Morning Edition
Doc Pfizer has been found safe and sound!! According to inside sources when the Sheriff threatened imprisonment without train running rights the two suspects cracked. They led authorities directly to where they had hidden Doc in the train’s loco....
The charges against the two have mysteriously been reduced from kidnapping to operating a train without permission. A misdemeanor offence.
This reporter digging deeper into the story has found that Doc had given the trains Engineer, conductor and brakeman the day off along with a healthy supply of Budd Pfizer beer. Doc then retired to his private car with one of Jim's girls for a little celebration.
A short while later the train began to move. With some difficulty, Doc made his way to the loco when the elixir kicked in... Needless to say Doc was unable to stop the pranksters nor make his way back to his private car....
Not wanting to be embarrassed, Doc arranged for the Sheriff to reduce the charges. From the glow on the Sheriff's face, he seemed to be in complete agreement as they boarded the private car for the trip back to the pepper plantation.
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The reservoir is also where the three frogs Budd made famous hang out...
That’s Fie on the left, Sirr in the center and Phud on the right...
William Robert Oglethrope watching from Doc's private car.
He quickly coupled on a car...... And then sneaked on out of the area.
Call the sheriff with any tips on these two.